When in your life does reality cease to be the point and procrastination take over to keep you from simply taking action on the mundane or complex tasks that bore or scare you? What are you making up about how awful they are going to be anyway? Whether it’s making the bed or making the sales calls, we all spend more time each day avoiding the action than it would take to complete the task. Humans are funny that way, aren’t we?

There are lots of ways to approach this issue of procrastination. Daily, awareness is the first step. Become aware of that voice pops into your head as you think about your “to do” list. What is it saying? Is it ‘a friend’ telling you to relax, that the client report will surely wait until after you finish reviewing your email, or is the bully saying “You’re never going to get what you want anyway, so why bother making the call?” Whoever it is, politely or impolitely tell her thanks for the information, but you need to get moving. Call up that Nike adage and “Just do it!“

The top reasons for procrastination are:

• Fear of the unknown
• Inertia
• And a sense that its not important

Which excuse are you using? I’m pretty good at all three, and sometimes in unison. The reality is that what we resist persists. If something is truly unimportant, then cross it off the list and stop feeling guilty about it. Making the bed may fall into this category. If, however, if you like getting into a freshly made bed, then as you turn to leave the room in the morning, ask yourself “What is the cost or reward to me if I spend two minutes getting this straightened up right now?” It may be marital peace, which has its own benefits. As Brian Tracy says in his book “Eat That Frog, 21 Ways to Stop Procrastinating and Get More Done in Less Time”, choose the thing that is most difficult or most dreaded and do it first.

Here are a few simple tips to stop procrastinating:

1. If it isn’t important, decide what to do next. Drop it, delegate it, farm it out, and most important, stop wasting time worrying about it.
2. If it is important, write it down. Whether you use the back of an envelope, a palm pilot or some other system, make a list of what you need to do, refer to it and cross things off as you do them.
3. Link the task to the big picture, whether that is a larger goal and/or something you value. For instance, cleaning the kitchen leads to a nice living environment. Finalizing a new client contract leads to increased business and financial success. Creating your business budget gives you a road map for achieving your vision of success.
4. Envision what it will be like when you’re done. Say to yourself how it will feel. For example, when I send those client notes, I’ll be free of the guilt and my clients will be happy to hear from me.
5. Find a friend to support you. We often get this done more easily if we feel accountable for our actions. Make the commitment to someone and see what that does for you.
6. Give yourself a break. Don’t always beat yourself up for not getting something done. Just accept it, decide if you really want the benefits of the action. If not, see tip #1, if yes, then schedule it, take a deep breath and just do it!

The title of this column plays off a great little book by Brian Tracy entitled “Eat That Frog, 21 Ways to Stop Procrastinating and Get More Done in Less Time”. Two tips stand out. For immediate impact in your life, determine the thing on your ‘to do’ list that is most difficult or you most dread and do it first. Second, know where you are going. Create the vision and then the priorities to support them.

In the words of James Baldwin, “People ought to do what they want to do, what else are they alive for?” So, create your plans and remember to include time to savor the moments. Even frog legs are a delicacy in some cultures.

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE, BLOG OR WEBSITE? Please do, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Dawn Quesnel, CPCC, PCC, known as Coach DQ, is a professional coach, radio show host and workshop leader. Through the use of her B.R.I.D.G.E. programs she helps marketing, advertising, and creative entrepreneurs navigate career or business transition while maintaining a healthy career-life balance. Her core belief that you can accomplish anything you set your mind to, consistently leads clients to uncover hidden resources and strengths. B.R.I.D.G.E. the gap and accelerate your career so you can love your life now! Visit www.CareerLifeBalance.net or http://www.coachdq.com today or for more information email me.

You want Altruism

Altruistic, self-sacrificial, and humanistic. They all mean the same thing but can you truly relate to any of these words?

No doubt, these words can seem daunting for most people. It is hard to self-describe yourself as altruistic and you probably think of people, so-called humanitarians, saints, or an eleemosynary who spend all of their time trying to make the world a better place. Don’t worry, you can still be an altruist without staging protests, buying organic or volunteering. What you actually need to do is make the conscious decision to align your personal values and ideals with your actions. Do not say you believe in something and then turn your back on that belief when action is necessary. One area this can take place is by creating a balance between your work and personal life. When this happens, you will be able to find a deeper sense of personal fulfillment and accomplishment in every area of your life.

This sounds easier said than done. Unfortunately, finding this balance or alignment can be difficult and help may be necessary. A major problem is that we often separate our work selves from the rest of ourselves, and it often happens that our actions on the job are the opposite or run counter to the ideals we truly believe in. Have you ever met the eco-activist who works for the chemical plant or a health nut that serves you at McDonalds? What about the pharmaceutical salesman who only takes herbal remedies? This type of individual, and the many others who struggle to stay true to themselves, need to bridge the gap in the separation of their lives and decide what important issues they actually believe. Once they can take this step, they can begin to practice what they preach.

While the examples provided above are to the extreme, the split is often not that obvious. It can simply come in the form of a working mom who wishes she could spend more time with her kids instead of traveling for work, or an ad designer who works adamantly but doesn’t believe in the product he sells. It is this type of internal conflict that can also cause people to feel unbalanced. They feel tied to their work despite the doubts that inflict them. They may be lured by the great benefits package, or the golden handcuff of an executive salary or maybe it is just simple convenience. For whatever reason, this disconnect is the cause of conflict and creates stress.

If you feel an imbalance between your work self and your altruistic self, maybe it is time to think about what is causing this disconnect and begin shifting your career perspective and that is what I am here for. My BRIDGE program can help you align your ideals with your professional goals and create the balance you desire. You don’t need to have your personal definition of altruism ready when you begin the process with me. You just have to know that you’re ready for change!

If you want to begin to define your altruistic self and find a more fulfilling work life consider visiting me at http://coachdq.com/. I look forward to hearing from you!

Coach DQ’s Challenge

This week take some time to reflect on your beliefs and ideals. Do they match how you live your life at home and at work? Are there any BRIDGES in your life that need to be closed? Pick one ideal that you want to focus on and make sure you take steps of actions towards living that ideal. At the end of the week, reassess how you feel. Has it made a difference in your life?

Are you crazy yet? In this frenetic space between Thanksgiving and the end of year holidays, everywhere I look I see it – those tight jaws and sunken eyes, the stressed out ‘merry maker’ striving to be happy.

On the flip side, I exchange heart-felt thanks and joyful greetings with many clients in celebration of their best year yet! The difference seems to be in what attitude you take to the event and if you took the time to think and plan ahead. When you say “Yes” to thinking and planning ahead and, “No” to the non-productive energy sucking things that weigh you down. You’ll have the holiday shopping done and time to enjoy decorating cookies with your kids.

Yes, it can be that simple! It’s not just an attitude; it’s your perspective, your choice, and ultimately your way of looking at things.

Take this year for example, for some of you it was your best and for others your worsted. Amy Cosper, Editor in Chief of Entrepreneur Magazine, said it best, “Depending on your perspective, it was a year replete with innovation, creativity and opportunity, but also a year of recession, high unemployment and low confidence. The dichotomy of the year and the emotions it triggers are telling signs that we are at a turning point-a near breaking point, really.”

Don’t wait until you get to a breaking point. Use the Top 10 Strategies for Holiday Happiness with Less Stress!

1. Create more happiness with less by letting go of overblown expectations. We are all perfectly imperfect. What do you need to let go of? Write it down and throw it away.

2. Make a list of what you are tolerating about the holidays. Try for 10 or more things.

3. Review the list and make decisions – let it go, figure out a way to enjoy it, address it.

4. Imagine things simplified. What if you didn’t have to buy a million gifts? How could you recognize folks without getting frustrated? Is there a charity you or they would appreciate giving to? What if you meet for coffee or give a gift certificate good for a movie in January instead of buying gifts? A friend I know gave her 96-year-old Grandmother six handwritten “get out of exercise class free” certificates. Her Grandmother doesn’t like hanging out with all those old people lifting their arms in the air, so my friend arranges to visit at exercise time to give her a break. How simple!

5. Give yourself a gift, of time or pampering or whatever you need. This includes asking for what you want! If you see a drop dead something you’ve been wanting – just buy it and enjoy it! Or, call your mother and ask her to get it for you. She will be thrilled that you actually like what she gives you!

6. Get over “that’s the way it is”. You are always at choice to continue or change things. Make the suggestion to change and see what happens.

7. Get over your stuff. If it truly is the way it is, change your perspective. If Aunt Susie truly loves to make ‘that horrid dish’ or give outlandish gifts, join her in the joy of the experience and see where it takes you!

8. Find joy and breath! Choose to wake up and be positive. Find or write a quote that brings you happiness and read it each morning.

9. Connect. Call someone you care about and haven’t visited with. Create a Skype date if you can’t get together and spend 10 or 60 minutes enjoying your relationship.

10. Relax and know. The holidays will come and go. You choose to be crazy or say no to those things that won’t feed you. Know you are a magnificent, brilliant being who has the power and radiance to connect where it is most important – heart to heart with those around you.

Peace and ease for the holiday season!

When you look in the mirror, the reflection looking back at you is the greatest advancement tool you’ll ever have at your disposal. Yourself!

Each of our inherent strengths make us exceptionally qualified for everything we do. They are always unique to our individual selves and this makes each of us a wanted commodity. The qualities that come naturally to us are our best resources, they are already there just waiting to be accessed and put to use. Once we are able to do this, which may take some help, it will be these resources that we will have the greatest potential of excelling with.

It is difficult to really understand the actually worth of your individual abilities and talents. Unfortunately, most people undervalue what they can bring to a situation, either because they have not yet discovered what their defining abilities exactly are or because they don’t understand how to use them. Either way, you are missing out! Even the skills that you feel couldn’t possibly help your performance, if applied properly and creatively, may actually help you get the edge over everyone else. For example, if you’re a tech junkie, why not start an e-mail or Blackberry marketing campaign to enhance your company’s visibility? If your friends call you “Betty Crocker” or “Mr. Maître d” you could use those hosting skills to your benefit by moderating the next company meeting or organizing this month’s event for your networking group?

Not only can your abilities be developed to become a great asset, but also your own personality traits. These traits are another positive feature you already inherently possess — what a bonus! If you can distinguish your strengths and weaknesses and discover how to properly apply your personality traits you will be able to make every situation work for you! Take, for example, all of the shy people in the workforce. Individuals with a more reserved personality can still march into a group setting and use this towards their advantage. Instead of being a wallflower at your next event, use your one-on-one focus and brilliant memory when talking with people. Talk to a small number of people, or with individual people, and give them all of your attention. While you are conversing, file away a few bits of information about each person. The next time you see them, you’ll have a ready store of conversation-starters, and your co-workers will feel truly valued. It’s all about having the right perspective and using all your personality traits to your advantage.

So, the next time you walk by a mirror, don’t just notice your outer appearance but reflect on the abilities and traits you possess inward and make a pact with yourself to use them to your advantage.

Coach DQ’s Challenge

As you approach this week, write down at least three of your strongest traits. Be specific, and be honest. This can range as anything from being sociable and practical to being an extreme risk-taker. Are you supremely organized, or do the little details drag you down? Regardless of the trait and whether or not these traits are related to your current job field, make sure you physically write them down on paper. Even if you don’t realize it, these traits are the tools you work with on a daily basis.

Once you have decided on the three traits you’d like to focus on, pick one trait and come up with a way to use it creatively as part of your game plan this week. Try to apply it to an area that has been frustrating to you – you may be surprised by what you come up with.

Have you ever had a dream where you are lost wandering down an endless road? The road seems to have neither a beginning nor end? You are stuck walking and walking but are going nowhere, you are disconnected from both ends. Now, when you wake, do you realize that you can parallel this dream with your life? Do you feel like there is an endless road, a disconnect between what you do for a living and what you want to do because it makes you feel good; your life purpose.

Why do you feel so disconnected from one aspect of your life to another? Why has what you do for a living become so unexciting? Take for example your school days. You often had the opportunity to pick one class you actually wanted to take – gym, music, art, or woodworking. You looked forward to that class every day because it was fun. All of a sudden, math has become your favorite class. Why? The teacher took boring, old math and made it fun with examples, team building questions, and games. The class you thought would be the most ‘work’ has turned out to be the most fun! You need start focusing on how you can make your work fun.

If all you think about each day is jetting out from behind your desk then you are probably not living your life’s purpose. You probably enjoy your work, but it does not fulfill the deeper hopes and dreams you see for yourself. This can often lead to a large disconnect and the feeling of leading more than one life, a two-face, showing one side at home and the other side at work. This is both energy and time consuming, and you need to refocus on your life’s purpose.

We all feel a deeper sense of purpose in our life and are drawn to activities that make us forget the hard work. This is your life purpose – a calling to do things that speak to your core values and goals. Your purpose can be many things ranging from raising your children, leading your department at work, volunteering with charities or spending your days photographing beautiful scenery. You feel drawn to your purpose like it has chosen you specifically. This is true because your purpose is part of your identity and you are drawn so strongly towards that purpose that you cannot deny the connection.

The dilemma then becomes how can you make your daily work and your life purpose become one, how can they no longer be disconnected? How do you bring the two ends of the road closer together? How can you make your work fulfill or contribute towards your life purpose?

Coach DQ’s Challenge

Take time this week, 10 or 15 minutes, to sit down and reflect inwardly. Reflect on what you consider your life purpose. Think about all of those dreams you only ever thought would be dreams. You may not have pinpointed your own ‘purpose’ yet but may have a number of interests that can help fulfill your deepest dreams. Have a piece of paper close by so that you can jot down any ideas that pop into your head. Make a ‘brainstorming tree’ and put each of these ideas as a branch. If you feel that you need help to fulfill your purpose then contact Coach DQ.

Don’t be discouraged, it is absolutely possible for you to take charge and begin living life to obtain your life purpose. This may take some help, and that is where your trusty coach comes into action! If you already feel a pull towards your life purpose but need some advice than contact me at http://coachdq.com/ to learn more!

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE, BLOG OR WEBSITE? Please do, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Dawn Quesnel, CPCC, PCC, known as Coach DQ, is a professional coach, radio show host and workshop leader. Through the use of her B.R.I.D.G.E. programs she helps marketing, advertising, and creative entrepreneurs navigate career or business transition while maintaining a healthy career-life balance. Her core belief that you can accomplish anything you set your mind to, consistently leads clients to uncover hidden resources and strengths. B.R.I.D.G.E. the gap and accelerate your career so you can love your life now! Visit www.CareerLifeBalance.net or http://www.coachdq.com today or for more information email me.

If you’re in a job search right now, you may feel like your resume is getting stuck in the pipeline, and that you’re not getting the attention you deserve. Here are some key points to help you get noticed in this crowded market.

• Create a Profile Resume. Otherwise known as a Networking Resume, this is an overview of who you are and what you do. It lists your accomplishments, awards and accolades, and education, and gives a generalized summary of your previous work experience. When you meet contacts at networking events or online, this is what you should be giving them.
• When interviewing or prospecting, don’t formally submit a resume until you’ve asked for the job description.  When you know the specifics of the position you’re applying for, you can tailor your resume to match.
• 
Use LinkedIn to research the company or companies you want to work for. You can use the Advanced Search feature for this. See if you have any second– or third-degree links to the people who make hiring decisions, and use those connections to get your resume into the right hands. 

• When you schedule your interview, get the details. With whom will you be interviewing? What is his or her title or role in the current project? How much time will be scheduled for your meeting? These are very basic questions, but many people forget to ask them. 
When writing a cover letter, don’t address it To whom it may concern. Yes, this is standard business letter-writing procedure but if you can get the name of the hiring manager who’ll be interviewing you, you’ll be able to personalize your letter in a way that gets you noticed. If you can’t track down the hiring manager, submit your cover letter to the head of the HR department. You can also use LinkedIn to search contacts who might be able to walk your resume to the hiring manager.

• Don’t put yourself in a company’s database until you’re certain you’ve made a contact there. When you’re already in the database, you don’t get as much face or phone time. Once you’ve scheduled an interview, you’ll have plenty of time to enter your information.


Think of these strategies as good detective work. Get curious about the companies and people you’re considering an association with. Remember, when it comes to your pipeline, quality is always better than quantity. The better-prepared you are, and the more awareness you cultivate, the more likely you are to land the job you really want.

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE, BLOG OR WEBSITE? Please do, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Dawn Quesnel, CPCC, PCC, known as Coach DQ, is a professional coach, radio show host and workshop leader. Through the use of her B.R.I.D.G.E. programs she helps marketing, advertising, and creative entrepreneurs navigate career or business transition while maintaining a healthy career-life balance. Her core belief that you can accomplish anything you set your mind to, consistently leads clients to uncover hidden resources and strengths. B.R.I.D.G.E. the gap and accelerate your career so you can love your life now! Visit www.CareerLifeBalance.net or http://www.coachdq.com today or for more information email me.

Have you ever noticed that it’s a lot easier to say something negative about someone than it is to say something positive? We all want the people around us to do their jobs and do them well—but if you’ve ever been on the receiving end of criticism, you know that it isn’t always the best motivator.

People are more likely to work hard and give energy to a project if they feel as though they are a part of it, and as though their efforts make a difference in the grander scheme of things. Whether you’re a team leader, manager, or business owner, it’s important to hone your compliment-giving skills and practice employee recognition.

Here are some ways to make your positive feedback go even further:

• Don’t wait. When you see something going right, say so with positive feedback.
• Don’t be vague. “Good job, Bob” can sometimes feel like a pat on the head. Tell the person why they’re doing a good job, and why their efforts matter.
• Don’t hush it up. Don’t pull someone into your office to congratulate him or her. Do it in front of a group—and if possible, in front of superiors.
• Don’t be afraid to jazz it up. If someone’s efforts were a big deal, make the acknowledgement a big deal too. Balloons, a catered lunch, an applauding boardroom—all these go above and beyond to make sure the person knows he or she is appreciated. Just make sure that the scope of the acknowledgement fits the scope of the achievement, so things stay fair.
• Don’t ignore the small stuff. Sometimes, it’s the little details that keep a big project on track.
• Don’t say it just to say it. Insincere complements feel at best like lip service and at worst like insults. If you’re going to praise someone, make sure you mean it.

If you have a hard time giving sincere complements, ask yourself why. Do you feel that good work should be expected, not praised? Are you uncomfortable accepting complements yourself? Are you afraid that your employees will get “big heads?” If any of these are the case, just ease yourself into the practice of offering acknowledgement. And while you’re at it, make sure you’re giving yourself credit for your own good work, too.

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE, BLOG OR WEBSITE? Please do, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Dawn Quesnel, CPCC, PCC, known as Coach DQ, is a professional coach, radio show host and workshop leader. Through the use of her B.R.I.D.G.E. programs she helps marketing, advertising, and creative entrepreneurs navigate career or business transition while maintaining a healthy career-life balance. Her core belief that you can accomplish anything you set your mind to, consistently leads clients to uncover hidden resources and strengths. B.R.I.D.G.E. the gap and accelerate your career so you can love your life now! Visit www.CareerLifeBalance.net or http://www.coachdq.com today or for more information email me.

I’ve worked with a lot of clients who have burned themselves out. Long automobile commutes and too much time spent sitting at a desk in front of a computer can lead to hip, back, and neck problems. Too much stress can lead to chronic fatigue, depression, and even adrenal failure. Too little sleep or eating on the run can cause digestive issues.

So how do you know when enough is enough? For most people, there are clear warning signs, known as “signposts”, that it’s all becoming just too much. And too often, these signposts are ignored, because we all think we can power through. Sometimes it takes a full-blown crisis to make us slow down and take a clear look at what’s going on. And what do we call it when that happens? Burnout.

A signpost by definition is a noun:

1. a post bearing a sign that gives information or guidance.
2. any immediately perceptible indication, obvious clue, etc.

Signposts come in all shapes and sizes and can be anything depending on how you look at it. For example:

• loss of someone or something
• a rare circumstance or situation
• a word or phrase that keeps popping up
• a person you keep bumping into
• missing a promotion for the 2nd or 3rd time
• a part of your body that gets sore around the holidays
• a new manager or merger
• a new idea or project/challenge

Signposts don’t have to be simply physical either. Sometimes, grace just taps you on the shoulder but it’s your choice as to whether you follow or stubbornly stick to what you’re supposed to be doing.

If you keep getting similar signposts perhaps it’s time to start paying attention!

I first learned about signposts right after my brother passed and someone suggested I read Cheryl Richardson’s book, “The Unmistakable Touch of Grace”. She’s a pioneer in the coaching industry, author of several books, was a regular on Oprah, and was recently inducted into the ICFNE (International Coach Federation New England) Hall of Fame. The book completely changed my perspective on everything and I’ve been recommending it ever since!

One of my personal signposts is my lower back. If I am in the car for too long or sit for too long for weeks on end, sciatica starts to kick in. I take that as a signpost to exercise and stretch more regularly. Often times I’ve noticed when my lower back is aching it’s due to lack of self-support and that I am spreading myself too thin. Anytime I’m not taking good care of myself, my lower back starts to nag me. Time for a massage, reiki, self care, spa day, etc! The message is clear that I need to take care of myself. When I listen, the pain goes away within a day or two. When I don’t, I can end up feeling crippled for weeks. And if I don’t give myself some down time every once in a while, my body will do it for me in a really spectacular way! Have you had a similar experience? Have you been noticing a theme, message, or signpost in your career or life?

It is common to have signposts happen in a series of significant events in your life. Could be positive and/or negative, all depending on how you look at it. After reading the book I viewed my brothers death as a signpost, I didn’t recognize at first how the book helped me to better cope a little more.

Something else I learned and are commonly missed as a signpot are intestinal symtoms which quite often are triggerd by stress or emotional upset. So, if you find yourself contending with intestinal pain whenever things get rough at the office, there’s a good chance it’s not just the cheeseburgers!

Learn to recognize your signposts and respond to them with compassion. You don’t always have to be the superhero. Except when you are Is the job you’re dying to get to really worth the pain to your body or the daily headaches that come along with it? Is the paycheck you get from your corporate position really worth that peptic ulcer? Is running your own company really enjoyable if you’re living on four hours sleep a per night? If the answer is no, it might be time to consider making a change before burnout forces you to. At least that way it will be a change you choose and not one that’s chosen for you.

In the end, it all comes back to balance. There’s no reason you can’t handle a long commute, an angry boss or a crazy schedule if (and it’s a very big if) you take the time to baby yourself when you need it. If you need further justification for self-care, studies show that workers who are under stress work at only 60% of their maximum capacity. If you think about it that way, taking an afternoon off to recharge can actually make the rest of your week more productive!

This week, try to identify your common signposts. Maybe it’s:

• increased irritability at work
• a physical symptom
• that person you’ve been talking with about starting a new venture

Then, make an effort to care and set yourself up appropriately when these signposts present themselves.

Feel free to share your signposts and the lessons they’ve taught you below. I’d love to hear from you!

Hot buttons are issues, people, or situations that really get you worked up. They’re triggers, and if they’re pushed hard enough, they can make you explode. They’re different for everyone, but we all have them.

So, what really gets under your skin?

If you’re running into conflicts in your business or workplace, chances are someone or something is pushing your buttons. Even the expression, “Pushing your buttons,” implies reactivity. When you push a button, something happens. Maybe the floodgates of emotion are thrown open—or maybe a nuclear missile is launched toward the desk of Mr. X, who is such a pompous ass. The thing is, your hot buttons are a “you thing”—meaning, they’re reactions based on prior experience or emotion. When you understand why certain people and things set you off, you can start to work with your buttons to make them less sensitive.

The first step toward resolving hot button issues is understanding. Maybe your father never gave you credit for hard work, so it really goes up your butt when people fail to acknowledge your efforts, and you find yourself working doubly hard and getting doubly irritated in response. Maybe you’re shy about expressing your opinion, so it feels like a personal attack when someone else does so easily and confidently—especially when you know that what you have to say has more value to the situation. Maybe you really detest suck-ups and lackeys. Maybe you loathe know-it-alls. Maybe ignorance slays you. Maybe you hate talking about money, or sex, or politics. Maybe it really bothers you when people don’t agree with your opinions on subjects close to your heart. The question is, why?

Unless someone is acting immorally or unethically, or violating the law—in which case the situation should be addressed by the proper authorities—consider looking inward when conflict arises, instead of reacting outwardly. Take a deep breath, and ask yourself why this person or situation really bothers you. “Well, he’s a jerk” isn’t an acceptable answer here. Instead, ask, “Why does he come across as a jerk to me? What about his behavior bothers me, and why?”

The answers you find might surprise you. Here’s an example. One acquaintance of mine was really bothered by her coworker. He never stayed late to finish projects, he never came in on weekends, and he never appeared ruffled or stressed. Sure, he made his deadlines, but he cut it close. “He’s such a slacker,” she would fume to herself. “How the hell does he get away with it?” After all, if she was running around like a madwoman, barely keeping up, there was no way he could be doing his job. It was like he didn’t even care. Worse, it was like their boss didn’t even care! Was she the only one with anything invested in this operation?

This internal dialogue went on for months. But when she examined her hot buttons, my acquaintance realized that her coworker bothered her not because he was a really a slacker, but because in comparison to her own overwork and perfectionism, he looked like he was doing less. He wasn’t getting away with the bare minimum: he was fulfilling his job requirements admirably, and their boss knew it. The fact that she felt the need to go above and beyond had nothing to do with him. He simply didn’t share her sense of martyrdom around the job—and at the end of the day, he was probably happier for it.

This breakthrough led my acquaintance to several other very important realizations, including the fact that she actively disliked her job. She’d been trying to work harder and “better” in order to make up for the fact that she felt like a failure for wanting to quit! Once she turned her focus on herself, she was able to resolve the conflict with her coworker without making a scene or stirring up office drama—because in the end, her coworker really hadn’t been part of the conflict at all.

Of course, not all situations are so one-sided. But as Mencius said, “Never has a man who has bent himself been able to make other straight.” If you want to avoid conflict with the people around you, the best place to start is within yourself. Learn to tell when you’re in judgment, and when there’s really a moral or ethical issue. When you resolve your own internal conflicts, you turn off your hot buttons. Then, instead of igniting a raging fire, a push might only generate a puff of smoke.

You can learn more about common hot buttons by taking the online test at www.ggci.com/leadership-development/hbt.htm. There are lots of helpful tips about how to understand and modify your reactions to common workplace issues, and how you can be proactive around the issue in the future.

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE, BLOG OR WEBSITE? Please do, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Dawn Quesnel, CPCC, PCC, known as Coach DQ, is a professional coach, radio show host and workshop leader. Through the use of her B.R.I.D.G.E. programs she helps marketing, advertising, and creative entrepreneurs navigate career or business transition while maintaining a healthy career-life balance. Her core belief that you can accomplish anything you set your mind to, consistently leads clients to uncover hidden resources and strengths. B.R.I.D.G.E. the gap and accelerate your career so you can love your life now! Visit www.CareerLifeBalance.net or http://www.coachdq.com today or for more information email me.

A good public relations strategy is really important whether your work for yourself or for a company. After all, you are your own brand, and you create your own security more than you know. You can have the best product or service out there—but if no one knows about it, it’s hard to get things off the ground. You can be the top expert in your chosen field, but if you’re not sharing what you know, you’re probably not getting the recognition—or the paycheck—you deserve.

Public relations is—you guessed it—the way in which you relate to the public at large, and more importantly, how the public at large relates to you. Getting noticed in the media, finding ways to communicate with as many potential clients or customers as possible, and creating a public dialogue about your product or service (or yourself as an expert) are all goals of a good PR strategy.

One great way to boost your PR is to hire an expert. I started working with HiRoad Communications about a month ago to increase my marketing to large company contacts with whom I have connections. That’s working out beautifully—but in the meantime, I’ve also had a TV interview and an article in my hometown paper “The Rebublican” of Springfield, MA around my new BRIDGE book, which was recently published. Plus I’m getting interest from other local media sources. That’s a lot of publicity in four weeks’ time!

If you’re looking for a PR specialist near you, the Public Relations Society of America (PRSA) is a great place to start. Go to your local chapter website to find information on members and affiliates. If you’re in Rhode Island or Southeastern Massachusetts, check out to www.prsasene.org to find members of the Southeastern New England chapter.

If you’re not ready to invest in a high-velocity campaign, you can still employ highly effective PR strategies to boost your visibility. Here are some easy, cost-effective ways to get people talking about what you do.
 

• Write a press release: Whenever you’re hosting an event, launching a product, or implementing a new service, it’s helpful to notify the local media. WikiHow has some simple guidelines that can be very helpful if you’re not sure where to begin. Once you’re finished, e-mail your press release to local media outlets (PDF format is usually best), bloggers, and anyone else you think might be interested. Ask your contacts to pass it along as well.
• Write an article: The best way to establish yourself as an expert in your field is to write about your topic. Even short articles can convey your expertise to a broad audience. Offer content to local (and national) magazines, e-zines, blogs, and newspapers whose platforms coincide with your own. At the end of your article, ask that your bio (and if possible, your photo) be featured, especially if you’re providing the content for free. I recently did an article for SelfGrowth.com which generated a couple of new clients.
• Utilize marketing services like Groupon. While you may be offering a discount on your services (and Groupon gets its cut, of course), your name and information are reaching thousands of people who are looking for new products and services.

Looking for more way to maximize your PR exposure? Woodridge PR offers a list of free articles on its website.

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE, BLOG OR WEBSITE? Please do, as long as you include this complete blurb with it: Dawn Quesnel, CPCC, PCC, known as Coach DQ, is a professional coach, radio show host and workshop leader. Through the use of her B.R.I.D.G.E. programs she helps marketing, advertising, and creative entrepreneurs navigate career or business transition while maintaining a healthy career-life balance. Her core belief that you can accomplish anything you set your mind to, consistently leads clients to uncover hidden resources and strengths. B.R.I.D.G.E. the gap and accelerate your career so you can love your life now! Visit www.CareerLifeBalance.net or http://www.coachdq.com today or for more information email me.